Old MacDonald Had a ...!

Oh, I couldn't resist this. I am going to touch upon an earlier rant about the Jeffrey MacDonald (Green Beret from 1970) case only because it is such exciting fodder for an animated discussion. I recently wrote a public comment about the current and still living Mrs. (Kathrynn) MacDonald. I call her that to distinguish her from the former and dead Mrs. MacD. I offered Kathrynn several ways to defray costs and ease her financial plight - stuff far more exciting and creative than simply propping herself and her husband up and begging for bucks as they are wont to do. She never indicated whether or not she was going to incorporate many of my good household hints, but she DID begin to visit this site - endlessly - every day - often. She would even go repeatedly to "static" pages, things that never change. Then I got bored with seeing her IP address so often, so I blocked her. Aha! Two days later she popped up again from another IP. Yep! I blocked that, too. There were even two law firms that came-a-surfing! Heck, I didn't block THEM, I called them and asked what was up.

I do so enjoy tossing that ball of yarn to the kitten. They play, pounce and romp so readily. But then ennui sets in and I need to move on to more provocative and intellectually stimulating stuff. Ah - Yes, I started researching how much the MRS. would be worth to folks in a sort of legal game of "Sue Me? I Counter-Sue! YooHoo!" Yes, indeedy, that happy couple was apparently SO hard up for the long green that they tried to threaten and intimidate me and another woman via an attorney. Wow! Wouldn't you think they have more important things to do? Well, to be prepared, I decided that I might need to line up my own little reciprocal lawsuit duckies.

Let the research proceed and guess what? GOOD NEWS TO MR. AND MRS. KATHRYNN (Jeffrey's identity got sucked up into her photo ops and interviews long long ago) -- THERE IS NO NEED FOR ANY BEGGING OR FUNDRAISERS! Awww, pshaw - 'tweren't nothin'! Y'all can thank me later! Mrs. Kathrynn (does she really NEED that extra consonant?) has about $200,000+ in equity in her house. That 4 bedroom condo CAN BE REFINANCED AND THE $$ can cover legal fees and all that. And that drama school ought to be worth something. Unless, of course, she needs to fork over the real property to other people? I hear that any one of her previous spouses might be interesting persons to have a good ol' down home chat with. Gee, maybe Rajeev or Steve or Steve? Yes, folks, Jeffrey thought HE was the clever one in marrying into money, but in fact it was Mrs. Kathrynn all along who struck paydirt.

Besides, Jeffrey is merely spouse #3 or 4. Who knows which? Who cares? She has a penchant for drama and now is not limited to the bourgeois confines of a small town kiddy theatre, but rather has a much wider audience in national t.v. and print media. A media maven, she ain't - except perhaps in her own teenytiny world. Anyway, she has her bases covered. If Jeff falls out of love - something that appears to be a standard m.o. for the guy - then she can try to win the heart of Larry King or just use the contacts she made from the MacDonald blah-blah-blah case to line up some local talk show opportunities right there in her little town. So, we have to see if she has put her overuse of the personal pronoun "our" (meaning she and Jeffrey)into meaningful use...such as on the title to her house. Last time it was checked, the records show that "Chez Kathrynn" was steadfastly enjoying the personal pronoun "hers".

So why ARE KatWoman and you-know-who sending out requests for money? Methinks they should empty their OWN wallets and Gucci bags first! C'mon, kids, America wants to know - Are you two in this "for keeps" or for mutual self abasement? (No that is nothing sexy!) The shameless self-promotion should, in itself, merit yet another life term for the ol' doc and the cancellation of any cosmetic inmprovements that the faded prom queen desires. Come to think of it, a few botox injections MIGHT just give her that wide-eyed look she aspires to unsuccessfully. "Old ingenue" is an oxymoron. We already know about the moron part.

Somebody - please tell this duo to pull the plug on -- well, on something. Just, for the love the Good God Almighty, STOP TALKING! Ay! Ay! Ay!

NOW We're Talkin'-- in English!

An English-only policy put one of Philadelphia's best-known cheesesteak joints into the national immigration debate.
Note - Correction from me: It is an ILLEGAL immigration debate!

From a South Philly immigrant neighborhood, Geno's -- together with its rival, Pat's King of Steaks, is the heart of the area described as "ground zero for cheesesteaks" -- Geno's has posted small signs saying, "This Is AMERICA: WHEN ORDERING `SPEAK ENGLISH."'

"They don't know how lucky they are. All we're asking them to do is learn the English language," said Geno's owner Joseph Vento, 66. "We're out to help these people, but they've got to help themselves, too."

Vento, whose grandparents struggled to learn English after immigrating from Sicily in the 1920s, said he posted the sign about six months ago amid concerns over immigration reform and the increasing number of customers who could not order in English when they wanted Philly's gooey, greasy specialty -- fried steak, sliced or chopped, in a long roll, with cheese and fried onions.
COMMENT: My grandparents came from Italy in 1910 and settled in Highland Park, Illinois. The adjacent town, Highwood, is where I was raised after moving from the West Side of Chicago. This area boasted a HUGE immigrant population and virtually MOST of Highwood was populated by people from within a 100-mile radius of the same region of Italy (Emilia Romagna). They were originally coal miners who started out in other areas of Illinois. There were also many stone masons, tile setters, dairy farmers and the like. The same surnames still populate the town. My grandmother took in laundry and their home on Laurel Avenue still stands. The family lived across from another couple, an Italian (Enea) married to an Irish girl (Bessie). My grandmother Lucia learned perfect unaccented English by associating with Bessie and forcing herself to speak English for the ladies whose laundry she did. My grandfather Angelo learned as well and was the chief custodian at Elm Place School (also still there). Every Italian in Highwood and Highland Park pretty much felt the same way about learning English. It was the old folks who really had a tough time to learn and so they remained within the smaller enclaves within the safety of the town through the church, the community center, the Modena Club, and so forth. Also, they were all legal immigrants.

Of course, it's not as if native Philadelphians speak the King's English either. A Philadelphian might order a cheesesteak by saying something like, "Yo, gimme a cheesesteak wit, will youse?" ("Wit," or "with," means with fried onions.) To which the counterman might reply: "Youse want fries widdat?"

COMMENT: In Chicago you would hear: Hey, gimme a Beef Samwidge, will ya"? ( old West Side) or "How about a beef sangwich there?" (northwest and north side)

The traditionally Italian community near Geno's has become more diverse over the decades. Immigrants from Asia and Latin America have moved in, joining longtime residents and young professionals seeking reasonably priced rowhouses. In the past 10 years, an estimated 15,000 to 20,000 Mexican immigrants -- many of them here illegally, community leaders say -- have settled in South Philly.
COMMENT: That's the word right there, ILLEGAL. But we DO speak English here!

Vento said his staff is glad to help non-native speakers order in English and has never turned someone away because of a language barrier.
COMMENT: See? That is REAL "brotherly love". GENO'S is helping folks rise above the barre, whereas others want to cater to sustaining mediocrity and the wholesale "dumbing down" of the U.S.A.

But the policy has "really upset a lot of a people," said Brad Baldia of Day Without An Immigrant, a coalition of immigrant groups. "For some people, I think we're just going to say, `Le gusta Pat's."'
COMMENT: Growth, whether physical, mental, emotional can be - and usually is - painful. There is a certain bittersweetness about leaving some things behind, not WHILE but rather IN ORDER TO, embrace new customs, language, traditions. I lived in Mexico for many years. I recalled missing some of my favorite foods and never be able to really duplicate them there, but while I did lament that, it was exciting and wonderful to discover NEW things that would become "favorites" that I (today) miss here because these too are not duplicable in the same way here. (FYI, I miss chilaquiles, homemade cajeta, ceviche, cabrito al horno the way we made them in Mexico City.) So the "le gusta Pat's" just tells me that that store simply wants to keep their customer base at any price...and the price is obviously an unwillingness to help the new wave of people learn the language of the country.

Juntos, a Hispanic neighborhood organization, said it plans to send people to Geno's to try to order in Spanish and may pursue court action, depending on what happens.
COMMENT: Typical litigious nonsense. And then - WHAT? Remember seeing the sign that says: "We refuse the right to refuse service to anyone"? Does Juntos therefore mean that if GENO's employees can't understand the language food order that they (the employees) should be maligned or, worse yet, cited for not speaking, in this case, Spanish? Hmmmm, and if the employee were, let's say, Asian - would he or she then have to struggle to understand an order in Spanish? Huh? Go figure. I think the JUNTOS folks are not familiar with the story of Babel (Old Testament). And what, if not separatist, is JUNTOS? Who is "JUNTO"
(It means "together".)? So everyone wants to "integrate" so they can be "separate" and "segregated". JUNTOS should be out there assisting Native Americans and African Americans getting transition jobs as in fast food joints, restaurant buspersons, and so forth. I'll betcha that is NOT what they do.


"His grandparents encountered the same racism and the same xenophobia," said Peter Bloom, the group's director. "Why would he begin that process over again?"
COMMENT: Yeah! I understand. It is NOT racism. I am multi-lingual. I lived in many countries. I respected the immigration laws and language REQUIREMENTS, the customs, the LAWS, of each place. So, am I supposed to insist that everyone speak English when I go to my family's town in Italy? How ridiculous! IT IS NOT RACISM TO HELP PEOPLE LEARN TO SPEAK MINIMAL RUDIMENTARY METHODS OF COMMUNICATION. IT IS HELPFUL.

Vento said he has gotten plenty of criticism and threats. One person told him they hoped one his many neon signs flames out and burns the place down, he said. But he said he plans to hold his ground.
COMMENT: Welcome to America and if we can't replicate our third-world mentality here then we'll pray for you to burn down?? Is that what this is? WOW!

Customers placing orders on a recent morning seemed unfazed.

Angelica Marquez, 22 and originally from Puerto Rico, ordered in well-spoken English, but said some of her relatives struggle with the language. "They always come and just say `cheesesteak,"' Marquez said, adding that the policy "bothers her some" but not enough to keep her away.
COMMENT: Angela is smart. Maybe she can help some of those people who non-English speaking learn a few helpful phrases.

When a non-English speaking customer showed up at the window a short time later, a clerk patiently coached him through the process. Eventually, both said "cheesesteak."
COMMENT: Good for them BOTH! Such little exercises in interaction generate understanding, comraderie, humor and pave the path to harmonious living.

Vento, a short, fiery man with a ninth-grade education, arms covered in tattoos and a large diamond ring in his ear, also sells "freedom fries" to protest France's opposition to the Iraq war. He rails against Mumia Abu-Jamal, the black man who was convicted of killing police Officer Daniel Faulkner in 1981 and has become a cause celebre among some death penalty opponents. Memorials to Faulkner are posted at his shop.
COMMENT: Attaboy, Joe!

Those who market the city, often using images of Geno's and other famous steak shops, are watching with concern.
COMMENT: I guess I'll call the city of Brotherly Love and tell 'em what we think here in southern California.

"I certainly wouldn't want a national audience to think it represented all of the wonderful cheesesteak makers in the whole city," said Meryl Levitz, president and chief executive of the Greater Philadelphia Tourism Marketing Corp. "This isn't representative of the Philadelphia attitude."
COMMENT: Oh, Meryl, please grow up! Where did YOUR family start out? Russia, Poland, Germany, Latvia, England, whatever... Do any of them, if living, still insist on doing everything in the style of their origins? If so, how did you learn the language? Phooey!!

Competitors are seizing on the controversy.
COMMENT: Well, "carpe diem" away, youse guys! Oh, yeah - that's Latin, a language that every high school student ought to take 2 years as a requirement for graduation. Oh, but wait, that's not good...we can't seem to learn English.

Tony Luke's issued a statement saying it welcomes all customers "whether or not they speak a `wit' of English."
COMMENT: How do they order from the place? Can one order in Mandarin, Cantonese, Polish, Swahili? With regard to the various dialects of Spanish, I am concerned that a gentleman from Mexico might say "echar un palito" in the presence of a Panamanian woman and get a mighty slap, as that expression has two entirely different meanings in those countries. Likewise the word
"papaya" in Cuba vs. other Latin countries or "coger" -- My oh my! Looks like a whole new can of worms.. er uhm I mean gusanos is opening up.
Gee, I'm waaaaaaaaaay impressed. Whattajoint - everyone speaks all languages there. Golllllllleeeeeee!

And a manager at Pat's, Kathy Smith, said of Geno's English-only policy: "That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my life. I'd rather listen to the Spanish than the foul language of the college students."
COMMENT: Yeah, like a comment from the competitor's manager actually matters. If she truly might possibly agree with Joe at GENO's, she STILL wouldn't say so. I mean, Joe isn't the guy paying her.

CLOSING COMMENT: All I can say is: Joe's blood runs red, white and true blue. So do the immigrants' blood...the LEGAL ones. But it is called blood, not sangre and not sanguine, and not sang nor aiya, not KBOPp nor blut. Learn it in ENGLISH!