Not Now - Not Ever - Never - Ever!!
It has been a long time since my last blog - sorry about that.
But today I have something to share with all of you who follow true crimes generally and the MacDonald Case specifically. As you know, there has been little from the MacDonald camp, public presence-wise since May, 2006. The media has not dealt a kind hand to either inmate MacD or the current-and-still-living Mrs. MacD. Well, sources in Maryland, QUITE close to the couple state that the wedded bliss is now more likened to "Paradise Lost". If a breakup is indeed in the making, how does one break up what essentially never was? Does one annul, since there was no - er uhmm - consummation? Does one divorce? Or does KatWoman simply cut up her gasoline credit card, remove "fastest route - home to prison" from her Mapquest log, and no longer answer when the caller ID shows "Him again, whining louder than the cat" - or do I mean, the Kat...?
Our heretofore reliable source tells us that the enchantment is wearing thin. Were it not for photo ops with Larry King, she would have bailed long ago. No, seriously, the report is that things are less than happy and now Kat Femme doesn't know how to get her big public butt/mouth/hair out of her self-created mess without eating several tons of crow. Somebody quick! See if Emeril (Bam!) or Chef Ramsey might have a good recipe for it au jus, sautee, en croute, or on a bun.
Perhaps the financial strain is getting to her. Phone money for "the man" is not easy to come by - you know, so many girls to call, so little change. Hey, somebody has to feed that hungry monkey. But from the vast amounts of phone "interludes" he has enjoyed, perhaps we ought to call him "Spanky". Consider selling something on e-bay: To start you off - cute prison-industry-made-gift, autographed photo (of himself, not you), hank o' hair, etc.
So, Miz Katthhrryynn (Would somebody buy her a vowel?) can now write a little playlet for her budding thespians, maybe a B movie, a book, a song. a Ken-like MacD doll that comes with scrubs, pajamas, and khaki prison garb - something to turn a buck. Or, she might want to continue to drive to the "slam " but she might carpool with one of MacD's other lovely visitors. Think of the savings - half the gas, drive sharing, some pretty titillating conversation to/from the visit, and of course visit sharing. Kat would have two hours and one of the friendfemmes would have two hours.
How thrilling for all concerned! How "liberating" (well, not exactly, but maybe sorta-kinda in his head.)! We can't wait to see the couple on Larry King giving America's couch potatoes a mini-thrill. Oh, ehough about their pathetic little lives - yawn.
Psssst! The word on the street is that somebody now finds the heartTHROB has become more of a heartBURN... Well, ya' can't say we didn't warn ya' (The mantra to be chanted while spinning or treadmilling is: They told me so - They told me so - They told me so) Let's see - dead wife, triple jail consecutive terms, aging non-gracefully, emotionally stuck at about 35 years of age - Holy DNA, KatGirl, now what?
I HAVE OTHER - BETTER - BIGGER - NEWS!!!
OH, YAY!
There will soon be a Jeffrey MacDonald Information PODCAST. There will be guests, interviews, news, and gossip. Fantastico! No, I am NOT the host of the show. Stay alert and we here at Lucia Central will make sure you know when the first one will be up and ready.
MORE NEWS? YES! MORE! (Can you stand the excitement?)
By early 2007 the hardcover book "Scales of Justice" will be available. The book is in galleys now. Again, be alert for its release.
But today I have something to share with all of you who follow true crimes generally and the MacDonald Case specifically. As you know, there has been little from the MacDonald camp, public presence-wise since May, 2006. The media has not dealt a kind hand to either inmate MacD or the current-and-still-living Mrs. MacD. Well, sources in Maryland, QUITE close to the couple state that the wedded bliss is now more likened to "Paradise Lost". If a breakup is indeed in the making, how does one break up what essentially never was? Does one annul, since there was no - er uhmm - consummation? Does one divorce? Or does KatWoman simply cut up her gasoline credit card, remove "fastest route - home to prison" from her Mapquest log, and no longer answer when the caller ID shows "Him again, whining louder than the cat" - or do I mean, the Kat...?
Our heretofore reliable source tells us that the enchantment is wearing thin. Were it not for photo ops with Larry King, she would have bailed long ago. No, seriously, the report is that things are less than happy and now Kat Femme doesn't know how to get her big public butt/mouth/hair out of her self-created mess without eating several tons of crow. Somebody quick! See if Emeril (Bam!) or Chef Ramsey might have a good recipe for it au jus, sautee, en croute, or on a bun.
Perhaps the financial strain is getting to her. Phone money for "the man" is not easy to come by - you know, so many girls to call, so little change. Hey, somebody has to feed that hungry monkey. But from the vast amounts of phone "interludes" he has enjoyed, perhaps we ought to call him "Spanky". Consider selling something on e-bay: To start you off - cute prison-industry-made-gift, autographed photo (of himself, not you), hank o' hair, etc.
So, Miz Katthhrryynn (Would somebody buy her a vowel?) can now write a little playlet for her budding thespians, maybe a B movie, a book, a song. a Ken-like MacD doll that comes with scrubs, pajamas, and khaki prison garb - something to turn a buck. Or, she might want to continue to drive to the "slam " but she might carpool with one of MacD's other lovely visitors. Think of the savings - half the gas, drive sharing, some pretty titillating conversation to/from the visit, and of course visit sharing. Kat would have two hours and one of the friendfemmes would have two hours.
How thrilling for all concerned! How "liberating" (well, not exactly, but maybe sorta-kinda in his head.)! We can't wait to see the couple on Larry King giving America's couch potatoes a mini-thrill. Oh, ehough about their pathetic little lives - yawn.
Psssst! The word on the street is that somebody now finds the heartTHROB has become more of a heartBURN... Well, ya' can't say we didn't warn ya' (The mantra to be chanted while spinning or treadmilling is: They told me so - They told me so - They told me so) Let's see - dead wife, triple jail consecutive terms, aging non-gracefully, emotionally stuck at about 35 years of age - Holy DNA, KatGirl, now what?
I HAVE OTHER - BETTER - BIGGER - NEWS!!!
OH, YAY!
There will soon be a Jeffrey MacDonald Information PODCAST. There will be guests, interviews, news, and gossip. Fantastico! No, I am NOT the host of the show. Stay alert and we here at Lucia Central will make sure you know when the first one will be up and ready.
MORE NEWS? YES! MORE! (Can you stand the excitement?)
By early 2007 the hardcover book "Scales of Justice" will be available. The book is in galleys now. Again, be alert for its release.
posted by Lucia Bartoli | 1:00 AM
1 Comments:
Great Blog! Love it and keep 'em coming...
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